The reasons why Pam didn't defend Greg
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Archived from the IMDb Discussion Forums — Meet the Parents
texxas-1 — 10 years ago(July 03, 2015 01:30 PM)
On this board I've seen lots of whiny men bitching about how much of a cow Pam was, and all I got to say is grow the hell up! Here are some valid reasons why Pam didn't "defend" her saint of a boyfriend.
1 As far as pam knew, Greg was just a boyfriend, she had no clue about his proposal plan. If they were husband and wife then of course she would of stuck up for him more.
2 Greg is a grown man, most grown men do not want a women defending them as if shes his mother or something.(Perhaps a really weak needy guy with mummy issues would). A normal man would feel humiliated and emasculated hiding behind some women.
3 Child parent relationships are precious, and build for decades, she would be stupid to risk losing that over a silly guy who would probably end up cheating on her anyway.
4 Pam was an intelligent, educated women. She was a teacher, not some trailer trash savage who would scream, fight and swear at her whole family to blindly defend some puny guy like you see some women do on Jerry Springer.
5 Most of Jacks threats and "bullying" were done behind Pams back, and Greg didnt exactly tell her now did she?
6 Family pets are precious. Greg was told never to let the cat out but he did it anyway. That was unforgivable. Jinxy could of got hit by a car, or lost forever. Pam letting Greg go home alone in the end was understandable. He tried to treat the whole family like idiots the way he tried to "replace" the cat. Then of course the cat trashed the house. I would of gone insane.
So there.
Texas Is Just A Name -
liverpool26 — 10 years ago(July 24, 2015 03:42 PM)
I don't know about defending him as am about 45 minutes in but she does put him in some stupid positions. So far she said to her dad who loves cats that gregg hates them but what I thought was most arlarse she says to gregg ask my brother for some clothes he makes the great point she's asking him to wake up her brother who he's never met and ask for his clothes and she just walks away like hes being stupid. If a guy I've never met woke me up and asked for my clothes he'll be told to fk off.
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TheOliverWaters — 10 years ago(July 26, 2015 05:49 AM)
4 Pam was an intelligent, educated women. She was a teacher, not some trailer trash savage who would scream, fight and swear at her whole family to blindly defend some puny guy like you see some women do on Jerry Springer.
So her only options were
a) shout and scream
b) do nothing at all ?
She could have said, calmly and assertively, "I don't think you should to talk to or treat Greg that way. It's not big and it's not clever." -
Katiedidd — 10 years ago(September 12, 2015 12:10 AM)
she would be stupid to risk losing that over a silly guy who would probably end up cheating on her anyway.
Really? Really?! What evidence do you have for him "probably [ending] up cheating on her anyway"?
I'm sorry, but most of your post sounds like a man-hating rant. I'm a female, and I always have thought Pam could have treated Greg better when they visited her parents. She was pretty dingy at best (more like checked-out) when it came to Greg early on the visit. You said Greg was merely a boyfriend, but if they were married maybe she would have defended him more? Since when do nuptials have to be necessarylike some light switchfor someone to automatically go to bat for their mate? Greg was not merely "a boyfriend" anyway. Pam felt he could be the one. Could have fooled me by the way she acted.
Here are just a few of Pam's goofs. Greg lost his luggage, and she wants him to go shopping with her jerk of a father he still barely knew, rather than the pair of them taking the trip. She then thinks he should just go up to her brother's room whom he has never met to grab some clothes? (A decent girlfriend would have gone the extra mile and proposed a quick shopping trip so Greg could buy a couple of outfits the day he lost his luggage. From the airport to her parents, they probably could have stopped at a mall.)
Pam put Greg in a position to basically stumble in the kitchen in pajamas without knowing they were having breakfast with those bunch of dingbats, and when Greg was clearly uncomfortable afterward, Pam says, "I thought you'd like to sleep late." What?! More like, Greg kept being on the back-burner as soon as they got to her precious parents' house.
Yes, Greg goofed letting out Jinxy, but what was with Pam enlisting Greg to go find the cat? To try to prove to daddy that Greg was a great guy? Talk about unnecessary pressure.
Lastly, you really think Pam's reaction to Greg being hooked up to a lie-detector administered by her father was a normal one? It definitely was not. Pam was in La-La Land, when the best she could do was say, "sweetie, you're doing great!" "This is a lot to take in."
Ugh.
Greg definitely had some follies, but Pam got the ball rolling by acting checked-out and like a stooge when it came to being in the presence of daddy. You're right about wanting to keep the same relationship with family, but there is no reason to disregard your partner who you want to become your family too. Pam could have walked a better line than she did.
Enough said. -
oprlvr33 — 9 years ago(August 20, 2016 08:04 PM)
Sorry . . but I didn't buy any of the lame 'reasonings' over Pam's behavior with Greg. She was selfish, immature, disrespectfuland spoiled. Not the kind of wife compatible with good-natured, good-hearted Greg. Expecting him to just suck up the rudeness and mistreatment for sake of getting along with daddy. Really? Somebody needs a timeout.
It was so Rachel Green and Ross Chandler. Selfish, spoiled, immature Rachel forcing sweetie Ross to suck up to her asshat father's behavior, for sake of wanting daddy to like Ross.. until Ross finally manned up and told her how it was.
Pam displayed no ounce of respect toward Greg. I would've kicked her butt to the curb, after the first week with the folks. And hopped the next flight back home.
Peanutlee33 -
Katiedidd — 9 years ago(August 20, 2016 09:35 PM)
I totally agree. Not sure why you replied to my post though, lol. Just a wrong button click? When I read your first sentence"Sorry . . but I don't buy any of the lame-ass 'reasonings' over Pam's behavior with Greg"I thought the rest of your post was going to lambaste my post!
It's all good though. We share the same thoughts on this. Surprised anybody could defend Pam to the bitter end, but then again, if someone thinks Greg was just some dude Pam was dating and was going to cheat on her anyway, they clearly have some issues with compartmentalizing the sitution: "Pam was 'all-good,' while Greg was 'all-bad.'" How distorted! The extremes brought up by the OP defy logic. -
HarveyManfredSinJohn — 10 years ago(November 22, 2015 06:06 PM)
Pam was an intelligent, educated women. She was a teacher, not some trailer trash savage who would scream, fight and swear at her whole family to blindly defend some puny guy like you see some women do on Jerry Springer.
It's interesting how you criticise male sexism and yet you think social snobbery and elitism against so-called 'trailer trash' is a perfectly acceptable form of discrimination.
And Pam was a damn kindergarten teacher. You don't need to be especially smart to teach a class of eight-year-olds (no offence to the good people who are teachers and do a great job, but it's not as if a high level of intelligence is
mandatory
).